The Wedding

The last day of our "great Shangrila-Deqin-Mekong valley loop" took us through Weixi county where the highlight was without a doubt participating in a village Naxi wedding. We were passing through a small village on the banks of the jinsha jiang (back on the yangze again by now), when Yang our driver/guide said she thought there was a wedding in the village would we like to go.

Well what do you say but "yeah", but felt awfully intrusive and uncomfortable as we wandered down the path to the family home having the wedding. Within 15 minutes all those feelings vanished, and by the end we were invited to stay a week!

It was a rural wedding, and no one but the bride and groom were in special clothes (a red dress of course) - just their everyday stuff- the older people were in traditional Naxi dress, (but that's everyday for them), so we didn't feel underdressed! W first gave our wedding present to the bride and groom (Money of course, this is China!) . We had to line up and our contribution was recorded alongside everyone elses in a big book- it had place of origin (for everyone else this was their village, for is it was just Ao Da Li A), name and amount. We gave 100Y total, (about 15 dollars AU), which was reccomended by Yang, other guests gave anything from 10Y plus.

That's because it seemed like anyone and everyone in the area was invited to the wedding! Seriously there were 5 to 600 people- but coming and going, not all at the same time. No wonder a couple of foreigners passing through were welcomed! And we felt like celebrities! At first people were a little shy, but after a bunch of young girls (12-13yrs) broke the ice with some giggley looks and stares, we were pounced upon by the old grannies of the village. The girls had us lined up to sit at a table with them, but when we sat down we realised the young girls had been booted out and the older ladies had bagsed us for themselves, including the grandmother of the bride. COnverstaion was difficult as their 'putonghua' was limited, and I don't speak Naxi or the 'local chinese', but we did have a jolly time together! One lady told us she had only seen foreigners several times in her whole life- and she had lots of wrinkles. and heaps of different people commented that having foreigners at the wedding was very "Nan de"- "difficult to obtain" i.e Rare and precious.
The mother of the bride and the cousin of the bride (it was at the brides family house), really wanted us to stay the night for the evening dancing, but after a few hours we had enjoyed ourselves enough, and our driver had to get all the way back to Zhongdian that night after dropping us off.

The wedding was held in the home- a large Naxi courtyard complex- with 12-16 low tables set up in the middle. As we arrived the tables were all full of people and being served two courses of dishes. We sat on the outside and watched the crowds, and they watched us. There were plenty of other people arriving and waiting around the outside too. Then when the people sitting had finsihed eating, the tables were cleared and suddenly full again- as evryone around the side ruched to get a spot.
Naturally we just sat on the side and watched this, and then watched another setting get served their two courses. We reckon while we were there the tables got set and cleared at least 4 times, and as we saw people leaving as we arrived, probably in total more than that!

We were wary of the food, but there's not much you can do when old ladies slip food into your bowl when your not looking! Though I can safely say now- several days later, that no ill effects have been had from the food! There were maybe 12 savoury dishes on the table for the second course, and oddly for us, the first course was fruit, sweets, and a sort of wedding cake.

Later Mum got out a couple of photos she'd brought, and these did the rounds- almost round the whole courtyard! They thought Sarah looked like a movie star in her wedding dress, and coo cooed over the picture of the three of us. Funnily they couldn't tell which one was me, and kept asking if Sarah was me in the picture! (You know caucasians, they all look the same!!!). One of them even thought Sarah was Mum! They nodded approvingly at a picture of Alex and me- oooh a chinese 'husband' (they kept saying lao gong- I had to explain that actually my younger sister got married before I have- probably means I am an ugly old sister like in the fairy tales :) ).

All in all it was an amazing show of hospitality- not just inviting strangers, but feeding the whole village and possibly the neighbouring villages too! Makes us seem a bit stingy really! We left with promises to send photos, which we really should print out tonight and send on their way before we get too distracted, and hopefully they interpreted our gratitude- I think they did!